The 17 Most Ridiculous Lawyer Ads Of All Time

by jchannell

Lawyer ads are not known for their restraint. At all. They usually feature over the top yelling, cheesy graphics, and laughably bad tag lines. And those are the respectable ads. The ads below fall into a league of their own. I scoured high and low to bring you the 17 most ridiculous lawyer ads of all time.

Make Em Say Unnnh

If you want to be taken seriously as a law firm, getting a washed-up ’90s rapper might help? This one is full of awesome.

The Gladiator

“I cannot rip out the hearts of those who hurt you. I cannot hand you their severed heads.”

I Think Like A Criminal

I can’t decide if this is the best ever or might just get this attorney yelled at. This is definitely a ridiculous advertisement. Remember, according to this lawyer, “laws are arbitrary.”

Machete Gets A Paper Cut

Where’s Danny Trejo when you need him? I see him suing for the use of his Machete moniker. This one borders on awesome, even if it’s nearly a parody.

They Call Me The Sledgehammer

This guy even bought Super Bowl airtime for this one. Might be the most epic ad in recent years. A very metal soundtrack is included.

Crack The Champagne For Your Divorce

“The illiterate boob at the courthouse” “Look at this website…a work of art.”

Yo! The Bar Association Raps

This is beyond cringeworthy. A middle aged lawyer…doing a rap video?

I Will Run You Over With My Moustache

If this guy isn’t every Texas stereotype I’ve ever heard, I’ll eat my giant silver belt buckle. Or my boots.

Pay Me Now

Where to start on this one? Singing lessons can’t be THAT expensive, can they?

Baldwin, Daniel Baldwin

007. Eye Candy. Fast Cars. This one has it all.

I Make It Rain

“Turn your pain into rain.” At least it rhymes. If they were smart, they would have had a washed-up 90’s rapper do the voiceover.

The Grand Master

Apparently Pete Reid here is the real 007, unlike the guy above. Or he may in fact be The Batman. Extra points given for the caber toss.

Get Hammered

The car slowly crashing in the background is pretty tacky. “I am the hammer, they are the nails” sends this into the realm of the absurd.

Get The Eye Bleach

This isn’t a parody, and is a real law firm. More rapping. The low-fi graphics would make the Syfy channel proud.

Live & High Def

In movies, they make jokes about bad green screen effects. Commercials should be no different. This is just painful.

You Say Ambulance Chaser Like It’s A Bad Thing

A bird? A plane? It’s Glen Lerner chasing ambulances in front of a green screen.

Watch Your Step

Our good friend The Hammer” makes another appearance on this list. Just watch the background and be appalled. Try to scrub those images from your memory next time you use the crosswalk.

Get The Phone

There. Are. No. Words.

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